I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already.

Corniness: 

I was going to tell a joke about fishing...
but I forgot the line.

Corniness: 

Jokes about air conditioners?

Not a fan.

Corniness: 

Q: When does a joke become a dad joke?
A: When the punchline becomes apparent.

Corniness: 

Q: What do you call a dog that does magic tricks?
A: A labracadabrador.

Corniness: 

Q: What's it called when a chameleon can't change its colors anymore?
A: A reptile dysfunction.

Corniness: 

Q: Why did the cross-eyed teacher get fired?
A: She couldn't control her pupils.

Corniness: 

I was wondering why my computer was getting so hot.

Turns out it needed to vent.

Corniness: 

Q: Where do the poor meatballs live?
A: The sphaghetto!

Corniness: 

Q: Why don't people like goats?
A: Because they think they are the greatest of all time.

Corniness: 

Déjà MOO - The feeling you've heard this BULL before.

Corniness: 

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