Q. What does a Mexican cow call his friends?
The Really Big List of Corny Jokes
100 Hundred corny jokes at a time. Please don't forget to share your corny jokes!
Q. What does a Mexican cow call his friends?
Q: Why did the pizza maker run from the mafia?
A: He owed them a lot of dough!
Q: Why did the skeleton sleep in the snow last night?
A: He was a numbskull.
Q. What is the difference between a dirty bus station and a shrimp with breast implants?
A. One is a crusty bus station, while the other is a busty crustacean.
Q: What streets do ghosts live on?
A: Dead Ends!
Q: Why does the vampire always get picked last?
A: Because he sucks.
Q: Where do fish sleep?
A: In a water bed!
Q: What do you call the opposite of a hot pepper?
A: A little chili!
Dishes a bad joke
Q: Have you heard the Cookie Joke?
A: You wouldn't like it. It is pretty crumby!
Q: Why were you fined for reading Lord of the rings?
A: It was written by J.R.R Toll-kien.
Q: Why is the sky so unhappy?
A: It has the blues.
Q: What do you call it when a shoemaker drops his vegetables?
A: Corn on the cobbler!
Q: What is the difference between a Hippo and a Zippo?
A: A Hippo is really heavy, but a Zippo is a little lighter!
Q: Have you seen the movie Constipation?
A: No it has not come out yet.
Q: Can a ninja throw a star?
Q: What's a comedian on a boat sing?
A: Joooke on the water!
Q: What did one eye say to the other eye?
A: Something smells between us!
Q: What's the longest word in the dictionary?
A: Smile! Because it has a mile in it!
Did you hear Tom Brady is getting divorced?
His wife accused him of "cheating"!
Q: What do you call a magic owl?
Q: How do asteroids get so big?
A: They take A-Steroid!
Did you hear about the nun who quit? . . . she kicked her "Habit"!
Q: What's white and can't climb a tree ?
A: A Fridge
A: What's green, brown and white and can't climb a tree ?
A: A Fridge in a combat jacket
Q: What do you call a bomb that doesn't explode, but lands on a cow?
A: A milk dud.
Q: What is Dr. Jekyll when he is himself?
Q: What is the difference between a poorly dressed man on a tricycle and a well dressed men on a bicycle?
Q: Why are movies stars so cool?
A: Because the have a lot of fans.
Q: A hot dog and a banana had a race, who won?
A: The wiener.
Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get soap in your mouth. Then it becomes a soap opera.
Q: How does a lawyer get where he is going?
A: He makes A-turn-ey!
Q: What do you call a singing Laptop?
A: A Dell
A pancake, a fried egg, and a strip of bacon walk into a bar. The barman looks up and says,"Sorry, we don't serve breakfast."
Q: What do you get when you cross a fish with an elephant?
A: Swimming trunks!
Q: How do you flatten a ghost?
A: Use a spirit level.
Q: Where does the electric cord go to shop?
A: The outlet mall.
Q: Where does the lion go to shop?
A: The MAUL!
Q: What did they do with the cow that learned the whole Bible?
A: Put it out to Pastor!
Q: What do you call a man that irons clothes?
A: Iron Man
Q: How does the moon cut his hair?
A: Eclipses it!
Q. What Crime did the tree commit?
Q: What do you call a young locomotive?
A: A Trainee
Q: Why did all the kitchen staff survive the Titanic disaster?
A: Because Captain Smith watched everything but the kitchen sink.
Q: What do you feed an invisible cat?
A. Evaporated Milk.
Q: What do you call a belt with a watch on it?
A: A waist of time.
Q: Why could the bee not hear what people were saying?
A: He had wax in his ears.
I used to be addicted to soap,
but now I'm clean.
Q: Why do guys play baseball?
A: To get to first base.
Q: What did the ear of corn say to Mr. frank?
A: We can be corny, dawg!
Q: What did the first street say to the second street?
A: I'll meet you at the intersection.
Q: What do you call something that lives in the water and works fast?
A giraffe walks into a bar and goes to sleep on the floor. The bartender asks his customers, "what's that lyin' there?" The customers reply "that's not a lion, that's a giraffe."
Q: What's the difference between America and a flash drive?
A: One is USA and the other is USB.
Mr.Banana said to Mr.Apple "Hello, Mr.Apple".
The apple replied - "Holy...a talking banana".
Q: What is orange and sounds like a parrot?
A: A carrot.
A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says to him, "excuse me sir, but there is a steering wheel on your belt." The pirate responds, "argh they're drivin' me nuts."
Q: What did the scarf say to the hat?
A: "You go ahead, I'll just hang around".
Q: Why can't you trust the king of the jungle?
A: Because he is always lion.
Q: What did the world say to the sun?
A: See ya 'round!
Q: What do you call bees that produce milk?
Q: What kind of music does the president listen to?
A: Country music.
Q: What did the swordfish say to the marlin on prom night?
A: Looking sharp!
Q: How do you find will Smith in the snow?
A: Look for Fresh Prince.
Four friends are touring Europe. One is English, one is French, another is Spanish, and the last is from Germany. The four friends are in Paris, and see a large crowd gathering around a street performer. They all crane their necks to see the street performer, but can't seem to get a view. The performer notices the men, and stands on a box. He yells out "Can you gents in the back see me alright?" The friends respond: Yes, Oui, Si, Ja.
So a grasshopper walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender says hey did you know we have a drink named after you? The grasshopper said "You have a drink named George!"
Q:What did the axe murderer say to the judge?
A: It was an axeident!