Q: Why did the fish get kicked out of school?
A: Cause he was caught with seaweed.

Corniness: 

Q: What did the green grape say to the purple grape?
A: Breathe dammit, BREATHE!

Corniness: 

First rule of Thesaurus Club. You don't talk, converse, discuss, speak, chat, deliberate, confer, gab, gossip or natter about Thesaurus Club.

Corniness: 

What kind of shoes does a thief wear?
Sneakers

Corniness: 

Q: Why was the pencil in the toilet?
A: It was a #2

Corniness: 

"It’s so cold!"
Go stand in the corner it’s 90 degrees.

Corniness: 

Q: Why do we tell actors to “break a leg?”
A: Because every play has a cast.

Corniness: 

You know my father threw a camera at me once, I still have flashbacks.

Corniness: 

Q: Why did the stoplight turn red?
A: Because it was embarrassed to be changing in the middle of the street!

Corniness: 

Q: What does Snoop Dogg wash his clothes with?
A: Blee-ach.

Corniness: 

Q: Where do you find a dog with no legs?
A: Right were you left it.

Corniness: 

Q: What did one hat say to the other?
A: You stay here. I'll go on a-head!

Corniness: 

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