A horse walks into a bar
The bartender says "why the long face?"
Q: What did the bee say to the flower?
A: Hi, honey!
Q: How do you organize an outer space party?
A: You planet.
Why doesn't someone invent a clear toaster so you can see how toasted your toast is while it's toasting?
Did you hear the news about the corduroy pillows?
They made headlines.
Q: What do you call a sleep walking nun?
A: A Roman Catholic!
What do you call a fake noodle?
Dentists make money off of people with bad teeth. Why should I trust the toothpaste they recommend?
Q: Why is Peter Pan always in flight?
A: Because he Neverlands