So, I thought about going as a ghost for Halloween, but I figured meh, I'll kill myself next year.
Q: What did one boob say to the other?
A: We are breast friends!
Q: What did one aspiring wig say to the other aspiring wig?
A: I wanna get a head!
Q: What's the difference between a bad golfer and a bad skydiver?
A: A bad golfer goes WHACK! ... "Darn".
A bad skydiver goes "Darn" ... WHACK!
Q: What you call a man with spade on his head?
Q: What’s Forrest Gump’s password?
Q: Why do birds fly South for the winter?
A: Because it is too far too walk.
Milk is also the fastest liquid on earth, it's pasteurized before you even see it.
Q: What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A: A nervous wreck.
Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath.
This made him... A super callused fragile mystic plagued with halitosis.